Hospital Diary

January 27, 1993 (Wednesday)

Since the people from the performing troupe were coming by today, I changed my yukata, washed my face, and washed my bangs while I was at it. I really wanted to wash all of my hair actually, but I still can’t lean over. I poured some hot water from the kettle in the kitchenette, and put it in the sink with some cold water. This was some tough work!

I can’t risk catching a cold, so it looks like it’ll be a little longer before my scalp will feel clean again. For now, it’s just the bangs, which I spruced up with a curler. After putting on some light makeup, I had my mother put up my hair in a three-way braid.

Well, I’m at least somewhat presentable, I suppose.

Even with just a little makeup I feel more at ease.

If you spend all your time just lying in bed and have people take care of you, you start to become passive, and mentally like a child. That’s no good!

All right, from tomorrow, I’m going to to do my makeup even if guests aren’t coming. I want to pretty all the time!

I guess I really am a girly girl, huh?

I stepped out into the hallway for the very first time to go return my utensils and tray. Even I can do something as simple as that. When I actually tried to do it, it didn’t quite work out. Even for something like that needed all my attention.

Just like yesterday, I had two small and three large needles in the IV.

Mizudori (a performer from the troupe) and Daimo, Oshida, and Nakanori (other members of the troupe) came to visit at around 3pm.

“You look better than we expected!” they said. You know, I did a lot to get ready! You know, I really don’t want to show my friends from work me in such a pitiful state.

They told me that they want to perform the public showing of “Jump,” performed by Acapella Club, with me playing Kyoko.

I want to. I really do. Assuming the doctor gives the OK.

My mother is worried. I’m sorry, mom.

I’ll read through the script tomorrow! I’ll definitely be able to memorize the lines here in the hospital.

Today, my room is filled with the scent of flowers. Pioneer LDC, TEEUP, Keiko Han, Katsuji Mori, Sailor Moon‘s producer Azuma, Pull Yourself Together Takeshi!‘s director Misawa, Studio Comet’s Komatsu… the room is crowded in with flower baskets.

When I find myself crying uncontrollably, just looking at these flowers calms me down.

I’ll get better, step by step, and head back to work.